Almost a year? For real?

I can't believe it's been so long since I've blogged. My friend D inspired me to start writing again (even though her blog is waaaaay more interesting and cool). Anyway, my "baby" will be 11 months old in two days. How did I get here? It's amazing and freakin' crazy all at once.

Bear is now standing, "furniture walking," babbling all the time, taking swim lessons, and has five (probably six now from how he's been acting the last few days) big ol' teeth. He's a joy, hands down THE BEST thing Steve and I have ever accomplished. It's so funny to actually say that, considering I've been able to do some pretty cool things in my short life. But nothing, and I really mean nothing, comes even close to being Christian bear's mom.

I think before I was actually a mom, I might have rolled my eyes at that declaration. "Oh gosh, that person is totally losing their identity to 'mom status'--ugh. I'll NEVER be like that." Oops. That said though, I'm also amazed at how Steve and I have been able to really maintain a pretty healthy social life and sense of individuality even now as parents of a little guy.

Of course I owe a lot of that to my fab mom who watches him 5 days a week, 8+ hours a day, and for the few vacations we've even taken. Steve's parents also watch him and give us time for movie and dinner dates. We're truly lucky that way, to have super support systems, but I think that's what's also made us good parents. We have a balance--no, we NEED a balance. I think that's just how I'm wired.

I'm still able to get my book club meetings in, dinners with friends, shopping, reading, etc. AND be a working mom. All those things really mean a lot to me in addition to just being mom. Sometimes I do really feel guilty, the typical mom guilt of ever spending time apart from bear, especially since I also work a lot. But when I start to glaze over or go a little cuckoo from not enough "me time," I know I'm not doing myself, bear or Steve any good!

Speaking of Steve, talk about an amazing partner in this adventure. I think a large part of my ability to function well as a working mom is having him in my corner always. People at work always comment that I don't seem like a frazzeled first time mom at all. To that I say two things. One, stop blowing smoke up my ass. And two, it's because I have amazing loved ones. Anyway, it hasn't been the easiest year, but it has definitely been the most fantastic year of my life.

Get into the Groove

So it's been over two months since my first blog post. Sorry so lame. Life as a working mom has been tough to adjust to, but we're just now getting into our groove. Christian is now a little over 6 months old. I've been back a little over two months now and while I miss the little bear every day, I love my work too. I have a new appreciation for both work and family life now. Honestly, work doesn't stress me out nearly as much as it used to, because I have my family waiting at home for me--especially a little guy that really can't wait to see me. Because of less stress, I can really enjoy more of my job than I did before. Sure, I still get upset, frustrated, etc. at certain things, but I don't carry it around with me as much as I did before. It's nice not to have such a stressful feeling about work.

I'm also thoroughly appreciating what an amazing support system I have around me. Let's start with my mom. She watches Christian every day and really enjoys being with him. He's thriving while with her every day and they make each other so happy, it's cute to see. And let's not forget she lives like five minutes away--very handy. Steve's parents, they're a mere 15 minutes away. We've been able to count on them for occasional date nights and always bringing us food and snacks. And of course, there's Steve. What an amazing dad and husband he's been! On top of cooking healthy meals daily, he's able to put baby to bed quickly when I can't and is handy for a massage when I'm exhausted at the end of the day. And of course we both work full time so there are nights where we barely have an intelligent adult conversation before falling asleep, but knowing we're there for each other is good enough for us!

Steve and I pride ourselves on our routine. It's like clockwork how we prepare to leave the house in the morning to making/eating dinner, to putting baby to bed, to carving out just enough alone time for the two of us. Sure, there are things we wish we had more time for, like spending time with the dogs or reading more to Christian or watching a whole movie without falling asleep, but M-F it works for us.

It's a busy time coming up, there are a lot of things going on at work and we've got events going on every weekend it seems. But that's what makes life interesting I guess! Cheers until next time.

Introduction to Life as a Working Mama

Hello, I'm the person formally known as just Sophia. Sophia the workaholic, Sophia the wife, Sophia the daughter, Sophia the sister, Sophia the dog owner, Sophia the homeowner, Sophia the somewhat obsessive, scatterbrained yet organized perfectionist who always tries to do it all and have it all--sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Well now I'm also Sophia the mom. Somehow, Sophia the mom has trumped all the other versions of Sophia and it's throwing me for a loop!

My son, Christian, is now four months old. I spent the first four months of his life at home, luxuriating in the glorious time off and basking in the glow of new mommyhood. Okay yeah, not really. The first month I don't even remember anything--it's all a haze of sleepless nights, nursing issues, and a pair of bewildered parents. The second month I started to get enough sense of self back that I began to question my choices and abilities as a parent (it begins) and obsess over everything that had to do with the baby. The third month I finally began to notice and enjoy being a parent and not be so anal retentive about everything. Then BAM, I'm back at work. Ta-da, four months just like that.

So my first week of work has been hellish, to say the least. My friends who have had kids and gone back to work advised me to take it slow, to work part time if I could, to ease myself back into the routine. Ha, ha, HA! I laugh at them. My job does not allow any of the above. I guess I should be flattered--I am loved, needed, and missed at work! Hooray! But the bleary-eyed mom in me says bah-humbug to all that. I'm also working this Saturday. Yes, the first week I am back at work, I am working an extra day.

I'm proud of myself though, I'm actually taking a day off to comp for working Saturday AND when I had to work late yesterday, I came into work late so I could spend more time with the baby. It's a new thing for me, not working 10-12 hours a day. I guess it's different when you have a cute and cuddly baby at home who goes to bed at 7:30 PM. If I don't get home on time, I miss everything. And can you believe it? I actually want to be there for it all. Sophia the workaholic? Meet Sophia the mom.